"Bottom Desk Drawer" by Mark S.P. Turvin Copyright 1988, 1994-Mark S.P. Turvin and Goldfish Publishers Acts One and Three Characters: David Whithouse-32, a television scriptwriter. Tall, sandy brown hair, brooding. Janet Newkirk-Whithouse-33, a college professor. Beautiful, light complexion and dark features. Patient, and a bit distant. Bob Morrow-33, a drifter. Tall, dark, rugged. Intense. Dara-A pizza delivery girl--to be played by the same actress playing Nichole. Act Two Characters: Dave Whithouse-20. Bright, energetic, ambitious and a bit cruel. Janet Newkirk-21. Quietly determined, a bit reserved, Dave's girlfriend. Bob Morrow-22. Seemingly slightly crazed. Nichole Samios-22. Tall, dark, gorgeous, and drug infested. Sometime girlfriend of Bob's. Rick D'Alanzo-20. Italian featured, a bit pudgy. All are seniors at NYU. Joey-A pizza delivery man. Time: Acts One and Three-August, 1996. Act Two-April, 1985. Setting: Act I and Act III take place in a plush "Two Room" studio in Queens. The entrance to the apartment is SR, near the kitchen and dining area. The entrance to the bedroom and bathroom is SL, near the "office" area. There is a couch CS facing the audience, and two chairs on either side. The television sits before it. There is a large picture window UCS, which at one time afforded a beautiful view of mid-town Manhattan, but is being blocked by a construction project just underway. The view is still there, but the beams and girders show it is soon to disappear. Act II takes place in the same apartment, but the interior is unfinished, showing the abandoned factory that it once was. It is sparsely furnished, and the plumbing is crude, but the centerpiece, the picture window with the view, is bright and clean. ACT I THE CURTAIN OPENS...to the tune of Simon and Garfunkel's "The Dangling Conversation" playing quietly. We hear footsteps coming up stairs, the jingle of keys, and the door to the apartment is unlocked. There are several locks, but finally, the door opens. Janet enters, wearing a tweed jacket and grey skirt. She carries a briefcase and a knapsack. She slings the knapsack down by the door, and tosses the briefcase onto the chair right of the couch. She moves over to the expensive stereo system in the office area and turns up the music. She exits into the bedroom, where we hear various sounds, closet doors opening and closing, water running. The song is nearing its end, and we hear from the radio... D.J. And that ends out the first set of ten in a row. The last three you heard were Bob Dylan, "Subterranean Homesick Blues", and then Jethro Tull with "Aqualung". The last one you heard was Simon and Garfunkel's "Dangling Conversation". This is Jeff Miller at WKLX, Classic Hits 101.1 FM. It's cooled off a bit today. Temperatures tonight should be in the mid-seventies. If you get a chance, KLX is sponsoring a classic film festival at the Paris on 56th. Check in tonight at 7:40 and 9:50 when we'll be showing the 1988 hit concert movie "U2-Rattle and Hum". We'll have a U2 classic hit after this. There is a used car commercial for Potamkin Cadillac. Janet comes in wearing jeans and a simple blue blouse. She moves over to the knapsack and takes out a handful of papers which she puts on the kitchen table. She crosses to the office area, where she retrieves a red pen. She heads back to the table, drops it, then proceeds to heat up a frying pan, adding butter. D.J. All right, now we've got another ten for Tuesday coming up, starting with Billy Joels' "Vienna Waits for You". The song starts. Janet leans over the kitchen table, smiles, then goes to chop an onion. She scrapes the onion into the frying pan, then takes some ground beef from the refrigerator and places it on the counter. She then takes a beer from the refrigerator, pours it into a glass, and leaves it on the table near her papers. We hear stamping from outside. There is a thud. Dave (Offstage) Shit. Keys jangle, they are tried in the door, locking it. He sees that he has locked the door. Dave (Still offstage) Shit. He unlocks the door, enters. Dave is wearing a three piece suit, vest and top collar open, tie undone. He carries a briefcase, which he tosses onto the couch. He takes off his jacket, notices the beer on the table, grabs it, and goes into the bedroom. More slamming is heard, then running water. Janet pours another beer for herself. She sits and begins to correct papers. On the radio, the Billy Joel song has segued into U2's song "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For". Dave re-enters, wearing jeans and a "Late Show with David Letterman Third Anniversary" t-shirt. He moves to his briefcase and takes out a few typewritten pages. He takes them to the desk in the office area and puts them in the bottom drawer. He closes the drawer and locks it, pocketing the key. He walks over to the stereo system, listens for a second to what is playing, looks back at Janet, then snaps the system off. He moves over and turns on the television. Janet merely shakes her head, resumes correcting papers. The first thing on television is a dog food ad. He uses a remote control to switch channels. He next finds a toy ad, then a baseball game. He stays on that. It is the New York Mets versus the Chicago Cubs. He rummages around in his briefcase, finds a script, and sits for awhile. The score is announced as Mets leading seven to two, and he gets up, moves over to the office area, and starts and loads up a computer. In between watching the game and looking at the script, he types a few lines. He reads it over, nods, and moves back to the couch to watch the game. The doorbell rings. Dave looks over to Janet, who simply shrugs her shoulders. Dave No, that's all right, I guess I'll get it. (He belligerently gets up, moves over to the door. He looks out through the peephole) Yeah? Bob (Offstage) Dave? Dave Yeah? Bob It's Bob. (Pause) Bob Morrow. (Pause, Janet and Dave look at each other) Can I come in? Janet Bob? Dave There's a blast from the past. (Pause, then opens the door slightly) Holy shit. Lookit you. (He opens the door completely) C'mon in, Bob. Janet, check this out! (Bob enters. He is wearing torn jeans, a faded black t-shirt, and carries a beat-up knapsack) Bob Dave. Janet. Long time no see. (He drops the bag, pause) What's up? Dave What's up with you, Bob? Jesus, it's been years. Janet We haven't heard from you since you went into the Peace Corps. Dave Somewhere in Africa, right? Bob Chad. (Dave nods his head) Janet Well, come in. Dave Oh, yeah, Jesus, come on in. Don't stand on ceremony. I can't get over this. (Bob kicks the bag into the room, moves in after it) Years. Janet Have a seat, Bob. Bob Don't mind if I do, Janet, thanks very much. Dave When the hell did you get back, dude? Bob Couple of days ago. Dave Were you in the Peace Corps the entire time? (Bob shakes his head) Then what the hell have you been doing all these years? Bob I got out of the Corps in '90. Bad scene there when a bunch of missions nearby were bombed. Dave I never heard about that. Bob Not surprising, you don't hear too much about anything in the States. Well, I had renewed for a year, but when that was up, I figured I'd get the hell out of there. Quaddafi was making it tough on all the states around there. I figured I'd go the Europe and bum around there for awhile. You know, nothing to come back to, what could it hurt? Dave Logical. You could come back anytime and get back into the grind. Do that first. God, I wish I coulda joined you. Bob I spent some time in Morocco for awhile, working there to get some more cash. Dave What'd you do? Bob The usual. I went to Spain for a year. I worked as an English tutor. I spent some time in the vega's. I went to Lorca's hometown, saw his grave sight. (Awaits a reaction) Federico Garcia? Dave (Vaguely smiles) Right? (Pause, then) Oh, yeah, God. Don't remind me. Janet What? Dave He's referring to that terrible Lorca piece I wrote. God. (Janet nods, smiles) Bob Well, I didn't think it was terrible. Dave You know we always disagreed about that thing. Bob It got produced. Dave Good memory. Well, I've been produced a lot since then, too. Bob (Silence) Yeah. I've noticed. I've seen some of it. Janet Where else did you go? We're only up to '92. Bob (Pause) I hitched around the continent for awhile. I spent some time in a hospital in Austria with pneumonia. That was two years ago. I stayed in Italy for almost a year and a half. I worked for seven months in the postal service of all things. Get this, here I am, I can't speak Italian in anything more than those silly phrases, and I'm dressed like I'm the Wandering Jew, and I apply for a job as a letter handler and driver. And they hire me. No wonder the Italian mail service is so wretched. Dave And in all that time, you couldn't even drop us a line telling us where you were. Bob Dave, I figured if I'm the kind of thing the Postal Service is hiring, you'd never get it. (They laugh) And you wouldn't believe this. I met Nichole's parents. (Silence, a bit perturbed) Nichole, remember? Dave Of course we remember. We haven't...Janet and I don't talk about things like that...about the past that much. Bob Oh. (Silence) Well, I went to Greece, that's were I met...right. I was in Moscow for about forty-five days. I was detained there for a night, cause my visa had expired. England and France. How about this one. I was a baseball equipment salesman for the Tokyo Giants for half a season. Dave Jesus, how did you get that? Bob I hooked up with...you remember Sam Harris? Dave Oh, my God. Another one I haven't thought about for years. Bob Well, he was working for Spaulding, you know, the balls and gloves and stuff. Well, I ran into him in Innsbruck. He wants me to try to palm off their equipment on the Yokohama league. I was paid big bucks, sent over, housed. After all was said and done, I never sold the league so much as a catchers mitt. They kept telling the company through me that they wanted to negotiate. I kept going to the games, then out afterwards to restaurants. Finally, halfway through the season, they spring on me that the only way they'll buy the equipment is if I can assure them that Joe Uribe would come over and play for a season. I was out on the next plane. Went to England for a month. Now I'm back here. Dave You got a place to stay? Bob Found out that my mom's place in Golden's Bridge is mine. It was in the will. Dave I didn't know that she... Bob Yeah, when I was in Japan. I was going to fly over, but my sister mentioned it to me after the fact. Way after. Janet How is Lor? Bob She's at Levi Strauss. She's a sales manager. We haven't spoken to each other since that little incident. Dave Well, I imagine she had trouble finding you. (No response) How about your dad? Bob Oh, his last book let him retire a few years ago. He still does some lectures, but he's mostly in his retirement village in Florida. He came up to see me. He told me that I can stay in his apartment on 78th when he goes back down. That'll be in a few days. (He gets up and starts to walk around) Nice job. Doesn't look like an abandoned factory anymore. Now it looks like a nice apartment with very tall ceilings. Not bad. (Looks out the window) Ooops, looks like your going to lose your view soon. Dave Luxury condo's. We might take one, if the show is syndicated and Janet is given the seat as chairperson of the department. Bob You're teaching? Where? Janet Where else? NYU. Bob Just couldn't leave the old school after all. You want to become part of the administration? Janet I know what you're thinking. It's the fact that I get better choice of class subjects and times, not like I've completely bought into the system. Bob Whew, I was worried for a second. As long as it's not just for the money and power. (Pause) And "Delicate Balance" might be syndicated? Well... (Pause) Have you had any other plays produced? Dave No, just writing for television and movies now. Bob No poetry? No short stories? I assume that you've given up on acting, too. Dave Oh, Jesus Christ, I haven't done anything since that fiasco after graduation. I decided then that I would only write the plays, not star in them. Bob But you're not even doing that now. Dave Playwrighting, scriptwrighting. Television and movies get to a larger audience than plays. Shit, one evening of Delicate Balance is seen by more people than ever saw all of my play scripts combined. Bob And it's so much more meaningful... Janet Bob, a drink? Dave Excuse me? Janet Boys, settle down. We can discuss this during dinner. Let's stay friends for just a bit longer. It's been about ten years. (Silence) Speaking of dinner, how long has it been since you had a slice of Gino's? Bob You've gotta be kidding, that place is still around? Is Gino? Dave You know that man will never die. The only way he'll kick off is if he can't toss pizzas anymore. Janet I'll order a large Gino's special. Bob No peppers and anchovies. Dave And no black olives. Janet I know, dear. I'll get them to deliver it. (She goes to the oven, turns it off, then goes to the phone and dials) Bob Rick? Dave Out on the coast. He's the one who got me the three picture deal with Touchstone after I co-scripted the Speilberg piece. (Bob nods) I haven't seen him since then. He's still an executive for them. He's survived four house cleanings. I don't know how he does it. I've seen him on the Disney Channel occasionally. He even assisted the director of the last animated picture that Disney put out. I get calls from him occasionally. He sees if there's anyway he can lure me out there. I can't go, though. (He motions vaguely to Janet) I also don't think I could handle the life-style. Too laid back. Bob But he is doing well. Dave God, more than just well. He's living quite well. The last time I was out there was in, let's see, '92. I went out to see that a certain scene that a director didn't agree with stayed in the picture. I stayed with him at his place. Huge. I can't quite figure out how it all happened for him. It's nice, though. At least he's tossed things my way. (Janet gets off the phone) And he's still trying. But I've got "Balance." CBS has also got me writing about four new pilots a season. And I also assisted Bailey with the mini-series. The one based on Collins. (Pause) That's sort of embarrassing, admitting to that. I had my name left off it, though. Went under the pseudonym of Nat Worthington. (Pause) I sense that you don't approve. (Pause) Janet You told him about Rick's latest endeavor to get you out there? Dave Oh, yeah, this is a great one. He's trying to get me to write a screenplay based on my play "That and Nothing More." Bob That's a wonderful idea. (Silence) Janet (To Dave) See. Dave C'mon, Bob, you've gotta be kidding. It's been over ten years since I touched that. It's dated, and it's silly, and I can't make that thing into a movie. It's too...elitist. No one would get it. I mean, look how shittily it did with Joe Papp. Bob Look how well it did at NYU. With a little bit of revision, from where you are now, it'll be great. Dave Jesus, Bob, I don't do art films. It's too graphic, and there's too much allegory. People can't handle that much allegory before they turn you off. Bob Nice thoughts. What, you don't think that people think? That they can't substitute one thing for another? Dave Sure, you can have things like a heart equals love, or the color red can be fear. Simple associations. It's not the same, though. That fucking thing was subtle to the point of subterranean. Do you remember what Terry said about the piece. Bob Damn straight, I do. He called it a puzzle knot. He said it was so allegorical that it was that much more realistic. Dave Oh, come on. It's not like what I do right now doesn't have levels to it, too. This thing was just... Bob (Interrupting) No, Dave, what you do right now has only one level to it. Dave Wait, wait, hold on a minute. You're telling me that Dark Horse was shallow. It got me a nomination. Bob I saw that in Kyoto. Even in Japanese, there wasn't much depth to it. Janet We're losing it again, boys. Civilized, please. Bob Wait a minute, Janet, what do you think about this. Janet Oh, no, I'm not being dragged into this. (Pause) Bob C'mon. I want to know where you stand. Have you encouraged him to take it? Janet Please, there's enough fighting already, why do we need to start this? Bob I believe you're the one to bring up the subject. Janet It was just news, not commentary. (Silence) Dave Have you got anything lined up for work? (Bob shakes his head) Are you all right, with cash and all? (Bob shrugs) No problems? Bob I've made it this far. Dave You know you're invited to stay here if you want. The door, well, shit, it's where you lived for four years, why shouldn't you come back and stay if you want? (Bob shrugs again) Oh, Jesus, stop moping, dude. You're always out for a fight. Always were. Bob If something's wrong... Janet Maybe we can call up Rick. You could talk to him. Maybe he can line up something for you. Dave At Disney? What can Bob do? Bob Hey, I can do a lot of things. Jack of all trades, that kind of thing. I could do anything from custodial to secretarial to production. I was involved with an Italian film crew in Switzerland for eight weeks. I did wardrobe and makeup. Dave Oooo, pardon me, I didn't realize that you were so versed in the arts after college. I thought you left me high and dry after...when you left the show and headed off to Chad. Bob No, I made sure to dabble in a little bit of everything. Janet Will you be staying? Bob I'll just play it by ear. Probably. Dave Good. I'm beginning to like the idea of rehashing old times. Janet, do you have the Dayrunner? Ricks' number should be in that. (Janet moves over to the office area) Janet Which drawer? Dave Top right, if anything. Maybe we should pull out the old scrapbooks and photo albums, and the yearbook. Make this into a night of nostalgia and reminiscing. Jesus, that's a scary thought, us acting like old folks. Janet We are old folks. Bob Speak for yourself. Dave If we call him now, he should still be at the office. It's, what, 2:30 out there? (Bob nods) Bob When's the last time he was here? Dave Jesus, seven, eight years ago. He says he hates New York now. Janet Here, Rick, home, office. 213... Dave Lemme get the phone, okay? (He gets up, grabs the phone from the table, and brings it over to the couch) Now, what? Janet 213, 753, 3500. It's extension two. Dave (He dials, waits) Hello, may I have extension 2, please. (Pause) Hi, this is David Whithouse calling for Richard D'Alanzo. He'll know who I am. Tell him it's concerning the script of That and Nothing More. Yes. (Pause) It's a male secretary. I wonder if Rick is... (Pause) No? You sure? I could...hold. All day? (Beat) No, he has my number. Thanks. (He hangs up) Meetings. That's the biggest blow-off I've gotten yet. You'd think I was calling United Artists. I wonder what's wrong? Bob It wasn't like he told you to take a hike. Maybe he's legitimately busy. Dave That's a nice thought, but not very realistic. You know the politico way of dealing with things. I wonder if he's pissed about something. That was very California of him to do this. Shit. Janet You should have let Bob do it, see what kind of response he'd get. Bob Maybe later. Dave Well, I'm really sorry about this. That was a shitty thing of him to do. But maybe we can call him at home. (Bob nods) Something to drink? Bob Liquor, or have you mellowed out that way, too. (Dave stands and goes over to a cabinet, revealing a liquor cabinet) Dave Here's the hard stuff; we also have beer in the fridge. Whatney's. And some Guinness. Janet There's no more. Dave When did you finish it? Janet I didn't. I went to take my lunch out this morning, and there was none in there. And there's only one Whatney's left. Dave Well, Jesus, I haven't had any. There were three bottles of each when I looked in there last night after dinner. (She shakes her head) Don't contradict me. Bob It's all right, I'll take the hard liquor. Got any Ouzo? Dave Gosh, I'm sorry, Bob, but now that the Greek festival is over, I haven't stocked much up. I've got JD, SoCo, Absolut, Bombay... Bob Absolut, please. Dave Coke? Bob The soda? Dave The other I've curbed my ways in. Bob No, I'll take it straight. Dave (A little snidely) In a water glass? Bob If you wish. (Janet goes to the fridge to get the last Whatney's) Dave I'll just take the last Whatney's. Janet Claimed. Dave Haven't you had enough, already? (Turning on her heels to face Dave) Janet (Whispered) No. (She takes the beer, opens it, pours it into her glass) Dave I think it's time for Comfort and Coke. (He takes the Southern Comfort bottle with him to the fridge, and grabs glasses, then returns with the Coke and Comfort, returns to retrieve the Absolut) I feel we're fast approaching the time to make a toast... (The doorbell rings) Pizza, I suppose, unless it's another long lost college buddy. (Dave gets up to answer the door. When he looks into the peephole, he does a double-take) Who is it? Dara (Offstage) Pizza for Whitehouse? Dave (Mumbled) Whithouse. (He turns back to the group) You're not going to believe this. (He opens the door) Come in. (Dara enters, carrying a large pie. She is wary at first) Dara Large special? (Dave nods) That'll be fourteen forty. (She stands there nervously) Whatsa matter? Bob Scary. Dara What, is there a bug on me, or something. Janet No, you look like one of our friends from college, that's all. Dara (Relieved) Oh, good. I hate bugs. Especially spiders. Dave (Takes money out of his wallet) Just give me two back. Dara Thanks. Okay. One, two. Dave You from around here? Dara Yeah. 32nd Avenue. Was your friend from college? Dave No. She was from D.C. Dara Oh. Thanks a lot. (Exits) Dave No, thank you. (Shuts the door, silence) That was exceptionally bizarre. (Pause) It looked just like her. I mean, when I first looked through that peephole, I thought I was looking at Nichole. Bob Yeah. Right. (Janet nods) Dave I'm sorry about that. It was quite unexpected. (Janet nods) Bob No problem. I felt sorta like I did when I met Nikki's parents. There were pictures everywhere. (Pause) Strange things like that happen all the time. (Pause) Dave Well, I'll get the garlic and Italian Spices, you (Motions to Janet) get the plates, and you (Motions to Bob) open up the pizza box and pour the drinks. (They set to work, and when done, gather around the table) Now, I think a toast is in order. To fond reunions, if unexpected. (They toast) Let's dig in. Bob (Upon taking his first bite) Oh, shit, this is like orgasm. The best. (All nod in agreement) It's like it hasn't changed in ten years. Dave Eleven, to be exact. Bob It's nice to know something hasn't. Dave You know, I don't feel that we've changed very much. I mean, thinking it over, there's not much of a difference from when we were in college and what we have become. Rick always wanted to be an animator, and now he works at Disney. I wanted to be a writer, and, I fancy myself to be one. Janet never wanted to leave college, and she didn't. (Janet tosses him a cold stare) Figuratively. And you, well, you wanted to right all the wrongs in the world, and you...left. (Pause) Bob Okay, I'll give you that we may not have altered our intended fields very much, but I think we've done a great big amount of changing. Maybe vocationally Rick is the closest to what he endeavored, but he isn't drawing like he wanted to, and he should have. You're not writing, you're rewriting formulas, Janet was going to teach High School, work with children. Me, I was going to make a difference. The world is no different than when I was threatening to go out into it. We've all strayed. Dave Fuck you. I do not...some of my work is very original. I'm what I wanted to be, pretty much. I'm well known. People have seen my work. Bob No, man, they don't know your work. Your friends do, but they don't. They didn't see "That and Nothing More", or the Lorca compilation. They didn't see that student film you did, what was the name of that? (Dave shrugs) Shit, I remember it. With the goldfish... Dave Conforming Corpses. Bob Right! That was brilliance. What they see are occasional glimpses of that. They see talent when it is allowed to glimmer from the 44 minute formula. You have fucking well sold out. Let's all say it for our various reasons and then see what the hell we can do about it. (Silence) Dave I'm comfortable. For some reason, you think you have the right to drop in here eleven years after you disappeared and tell me that I'm morally reprehensible because I can make money doing something I enjoy doing and that I do well. Bob But you don't really enjoy it, do you? You don't really enjoy this...drivel you put out 24 weeks a year, do you? There was a time when you insisted that all you wanted to do was inform, educate. You wanted the audience to walk away with something lasting. How long do you think the shit you put out lasts now? Do they even remember it when the commercials are over and the next show is starting? Dave Fuck you! I'm making money. That's what you find so fucking distasteful. I'm not allowed to do something as sick and conformist as that. Maybe some of us don't have the chips on the shoulder that you do. Maybe I don't want to circle the world trying to find answers. Maybe I don't need answers to everything anymore. And maybe I finally figured out that I don't have them, either. Bob That's not Dave Whithouse talking. That's the retreat signal. The person I left wouldn't ever have said that. Dave I grew up, Bob. I found out that the world won't read or watch or look at something unless it's entertaining. I found out that the honey, not the vinegar, attracts the flies. Bob And you've got a lot of flies buzzing around that shit you produce. Janet Shut the fuck up, both of you. (Silence, as...THE LIGHTS BEGIN TO FADE) We've changed, and we've remained the same. That's good, and that's bad. Bob (The lights have faded completely onstage, with the only light coming in from the big picture window) And how much did you have to do with it? ACT II Scene 1 THE CURTAIN RISES...to the stage in darkness. What light there is streams in through the window, which reveals a beautiful view of mid-town Manhattan, unhindered. It is late morning, so the sun itself is not showing, but the way that the window is lit shows that it is a bright, cloudless day. From the desk comes a moan. It is a low moan, belying a hangover. A second moan answers the first, which comes from under the sink. There is the sound of movement from the area where the desk sits (the only thing that is the same from the first act). Dave (From the desk) What the fuck time is it? (There is silence) Somebody got a watch? Bob (From under the sink) Oh, shit. Shut the fuck up. It's gotta be like eight o'clock or something. (There is movement from the couch, and we can see a woman's silhouette move over and toward the door. She turns on the light) We see the apartment as it is set up in 1985, when Dave, Bob and Rick live there as seniors in NYU. There is a trashed couch and two folding chairs around two tablecloth covered milkcrates. There is a bookshelf behind that is evenly divided between books and bottles. The sink is like one you'd find in an old factory--a basin. There are three small refrigerators and one very old one next to those. On the table there is a stereo system. The door to the bedroom is open. Under the sink, with cases of beer cans, lies Bob. On the desk, using an electronic typewriter as a pillow, lies Dave. It is Janet who has turned on the light. Bob Oh, shit, turn that out, Janet. (Dave covers his eyes with a manuscript) Rick (From the bedroom) Shit, guys, can you keep it down in there, some of us are trying to get some sleep. Janet (Looking at her watch) Boys, it's eleven o'clock. Bob, you have a class at one-ten. Dave, you have to meet with your tech designer at one-thirty, and (She raises her voice a notch) Rick! You missed Animation Four again. That's your third cut. Rick (From bedroom) Oh, shit. No fucking way. It's Wednesday already? Dave Bob, you get the bathroom first, since you've gotta get to class. Bob (Mumbled) You just don't want to get up first. (He gets up, goes into the bedroom area) Dave Hey, Rick, how'd you do last night with Lance? Rick (Coming in from the bedroom, dressed in Mickey Mouse pajamas) Fuck you. You see him here? You see me at his place? You figure it out, dickless. (Sees Janet) Oh, I'm sorry. No offense. I'm sure he has one. (He goes over to one of the small refrigerators, takes out a hard boiled egg and a can of Sprite) Is there any more beer left? Janet For breakfast? Please. Rick No, I was just wondering how much we drank last night. (He goes over to the large fridge, opens it to reveal it half full with cases) Holy shit, we drank about six cases last night. Janet Well, don't forget there were six other people here last night. Rick Six? I thought it was only the cast last night. Janet No, Tony stopped by, too. He dropped off the building schedule for the last two weeks. He brought Jeff with him. Rick Oh, Jeff Miller. He is a hot one. Too bad he's straight. Dave Could you two yak it up elsewhere. I'm trying to sleep. Janet Why don't you go into the bedroom. Nobody's in his bed, right? Rick Just his wardrobe. Dave Why do you think I crashed out here? Janet Because I was out here? (Dave chuckles rudely) Fine. (She goes over to the sink and pulls out a small electric stove) What do you want this morning? Waffles? Rick There aren't any left. Lance used them to show me his scene design for his production of "Bodies Pointing Northeast." Dave Oh, shit. What else is there? (He gets up, stretches, and straightens up his desk) Janet Did you use the pancakes, too? Rick No, but there's no more toothpicks and Vasaline. Dave I am so disgusted. Rick Asshole, it's not what you think. And he accidentally burned your lace napkin. Janet What? Rick For the torching effect. It looked great, wait'll you see it. Janet Damnit, those were my grandmother's. Rick, must you be a complete jerk? Rick I'll pay for them, okay? Janet You just don't go out and buy antique lace. (Dave moves over to her) Dave We'll see what we can do. (She moves away, goes into the bedroom) Good show, dick. Rick Yeah, yeah. I didn't know what he was going to do with it. (There is a knock at the door, Dave looks to Rick, who shrugs) Dave I guess I'll get it. (He moves to the door, in transit) Who is it? Nichole (She says something that is mumbled) Dave Who the fuck? (He looks into the peephole, then back at Rick) Vamoose. Rick To where? Dave Be creative. (Rick goes into the bedroom, Dave opens the door, and Nichole enters) Nichole Is she gone? (Dave jerks his head towards the bedroom just as Janet enters, carrying the remains of her napkin) Janet Just take a look at what Lance... (Sees Nichole) Oh, hi Nichole, Bob's in the shower. Nichole (Looks to Dave) Maybe I should join him. (She takes a pre-rolled joint from her pocketbook) Mind? Dave As long as you share. Janet (Disapprovingly) Remember, you've got to meet with Toni and Larry at one-thirty. (She goes into the bedroom with a handful of books) Nichole I knew that would work. (She hands the joint to Dave after lighting up, he takes a hit and passes it back to her, she kisses him) I didn't know the Ice Princess had stayed. Dave Nichole, lay off her. Things are getting too out of hand. She probably suspects... Nichole Fuck her. I'm sorry, that's right, you can't; that's why you're with me. (She takes a long drag) Dave Why don't you go in to Bob? (She looks at him angrily) What I said last night wasn't a joke. It's gotta stop. (She snickers) I'm serious. (She offers him the joint) Thank you. Rick (Offstage) Is that pot I smell? Nichole Of course, while it gets rid of the Princess, it attracts the Pot Fiend. Janet (Offstage) You can't go in to talk to your professor while your high. Rick (Offstage) I've done it plenty of times. (Enters wearing jeans and a Mickey Mouse sweatshirt) Mind if I join you? Nichole Not at all. (She offers the joint to him, then snatches it away as he goes for it) Come on, catch it. (She pulls it away once more as he goes for it) What are you, addicted or something? Rick Gimme a break. (He finally grabs it, draws deeply on it) Well, you're the least bleary-eyed of all of us. You were here last night. Nichole What I use doesn't give me hangovers. (The water in the shower stops) I guess Bobby is done washing his little self. (She sits on the couch, to Dave) You know, you were a bastard last night. I still don't think that Joe shoulda let you direct your own play. You were on my case constantly. Bob's, too. Dave I want it to be good. If this thing hits at the Public the way that it did at Tisch, this could be the start of our rep group. I mean, with you and Bob and, God, to think that Shari and Sue are only sophomores. And we can just bring along our entire goddamned department. But it's not going to be the same. We've gotta see this through better. I mean, part of the reason we did so well at Tisch is that we know most everybody there. Shit, man, in four weeks, we go commercial. It won't be just your parents and mine and our clique that makes us go this time. I've gotta lay it out on you so that I make sure you aren't just slacking. Nichole I don't slack off. You know that. (Janet enters) Dave I know, Nikki, I think you're the best. You know how I feel about you...the way you work. I usually have no problem with you. I just say a word, and you've got it. It's always amazing. Bob, too. Jesus, we could be the Brat Pack of the stage. Me writing, you guys acting, and we get Terry to direct, and Janet as our manager. It'd be great. (Bob comes in dressed in jeans and a t-shirt for a production of "Merrily We Roll Along" with the name Frank on the back ) Bob Oh, Nikki, you're here. I didn't expect you 'til... (He looks at his watch) five minutes ago. (He goes over and kisses her) We've gotta watch Terry's directing scene in class today. Shari's in it. It's gonna be fuckin' amazing. He's doing a Commedia D'ell arte scene. He asked Larry to set up a trapeze and trampoline, and he's got his actors dressed up like the Marx Brothers. Dave Yeah, I heard about that. I'd love to see it, but I'm meeting Larry and Antonia then. I'll see if we can move it back a bit. Janet I've got Shakespeare's Tragedies then, but send my best. (Dave nods, Nichole has lit up another joint) Bob I thought you'd run out after last night. Nichole Fresh supplies. My roommate brought in a shitload of stuff. We'll be partying for weeks. Rick Knowing you, it won't last that long. Nichole Look who's talking. Mooch. (She passes the joint to him) So how'd you do with Lance last night. I saw you guys avidly at work on some kind of masterpiece. You get some ass. Rick Fuck you. We're just friends. (He passes the joint to Bob, who draws deeply) Anyway, I think he's straight. (Bob passes the joint to Dave, while Janet gets a beer from the fridge, unnoticed) Nichole Fuck that, he swings like a garden gate. (She pauses) No offense intended to those present who join him. (Rick pushes her) Don't worry, little Ricky, someday your prince will come. (They all look at her, and start to laugh) Bob Sick, Nikki, real sick. Janet We really should be going, now. Nichole The life of the party. Dave She's right. Let's get outta here, grab some lunch at Gino's. Rick We're having Gino's tonight. It's Wednesday. Bob Wednesday is Prince Spaghetti day, asshole. Dave And you, the Italian, didn't even know that. Dave and Bob (Simultaneously) Anthony! Anthony! (They laugh, as they begin to leave, Bob and Nichole first, Rick and Janet next, and Dave goes back to retrieve a manuscript from the bottom drawer of the desk; Nichole reenters) Nichole You're not getting away from me. Dave There's no other way. Bob. Janet. Nichole You. Me. (Dave shakes his head, she exits. He closes the drawer, locks it, and pockets the key; Janet returns) Janet I was going to remind you not to forget that. Dave Are you angry at me about something? Janet You are going to finish your degree, right? I mean, you've only got a few months. You won't leave school if this thing hits, right? Dave Of course. Is that what you were worried about? Janet Part of it. Let's go. They're waiting. (She twirls, exits, he follows, snapping out the lights) TO BE CONTINUED...